AITA for not giving half of my fortune to my brother?

He was never the favorite child. But he was the one sent away to earn money for everyone else. A 30-year-old man shared how he grew up feeling like the unwanted middle child. When his family struggled financially, his mother chose to send him abroad to work—so her favorite son could stay home.

Newly married, he left his wife behind in the village, missed the birth of his child, and worked under harsh conditions for five years. He saved, invested, sold part of his land, and eventually built a successful business. Just when life finally stabilized in the city with his wife and child, his family made a demand: split everything he earned in half with his older brother.

‘AITA for not giving half of my fortune to my brother?’

He began by describing the favoritism:

I (M30) and my brother (M32) are not so close from the beginning mainly due to favoritism and i being the unwanted middle child, we have a younger sister (F29).

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We have farm lands but the farm were not so huge and yeild of the farm is comparatively very low, not enough for our family.

so when my mom got an opportunity to send one of her sons to foreign land to work, she decided to send me instead because she wanted her favorite child...

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Eventhough i got married recently and leaving for work means leaving my wife here at the village because the pay and working conditions were not good enough alongside i have...

Despite being newly married, he went:

I left for work & worked for 5 years with only 2 home visits a year, tough time for my wife & kid. i also had to miss my child...

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In those 5 years i gained a lot of exposure and decided to start something of my own, for this i had to sell half of my share of land,...

They didn't supported any of this but i still did it and it turns out to be the best thing i have ever done in my life, my business made...

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Then came the demand:

Everything was going well for me until my mom brother and sister demanded that whatever fortune i made should be divided equally between me and my brother.

there reasoning for this is i only get to work outside and get the exposure for my business because my brother took care of my family at the village, and...

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so whatever success i got after moving out of the village was not of my own but a shared success with my brother and he should get half of it.

while my reasoning is _ i never choose to go, i was forced because he wanted to stay and we didn't have enough for all of us. whatever time i...

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he getting paid for it also when i was outisde my brother used to work on my share of land also so whatever money generated from it used to go...

not to my wife i would also like to mention that if i choose someone else to work on my land then i would have got a much higher amount...

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but i didnt because deep down i also wanted him to be present for my family eventhough that means sacrificing some money.

Community pressure followed:

my extended family and my community is also supporting my brother claims and everyone except for my family and my wife family are against me and calling me AH for...

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At its core, this conflict revolves around obligation versus ownership. He didn’t leave by choice—he left because he was selected. He sent money home consistently and allowed his brother to work his share of the land.

Family therapist Dr. Ramani Durvasula has spoken about how financial success can trigger entitlement within family systems, especially where favoritism already exists. When long-standing hierarchies remain unresolved, prosperity can reopen old dynamics—this time with money attached.

His brother’s contribution appears to have been managing land from which he benefited directly. Meanwhile, the storyteller assumed personal risk, endured separation, and invested capital into his business.

A fair approach would require transparent accounting—measurable contributions rather than emotional claims. Demanding half of someone’s fortune based solely on kinship lacks both legal and ethical grounding.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

The overwhelming majority of social media users supported him:

TheGingerCynic − You were sent away to work and send money back to them - you've more than done your share, and they haven't been supporting you.

NTA If I were you, I'd stop sending anything back to them, they haven't been treating you like family for years. They've been treating you as a source of income...

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Aurelizian − NTA - My guy, you are still the unwanted one, just with money now and they try to do what they always did and push the thumb onto...

Distance yourself from these horrendous people and free yourself from that. You and your wife deserve a life of your own.

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No-Midnight6015 − NTA it’s not your job to parent your brother

AmbitiousEdi − NTA, you made that money for your family - your wife and child! Your brother can make his own money.

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United-Manner20 − NTA- they see you as a bank account , not family. They would never do it for you if he had been the one to leave. You’re an...

creepinghippo − So you get a third of everything they own? You get a third of the farm again? What if the opportunity went wrong and you owed £100k in...

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scoop_booty − Conversely, if your efforts after leaving home would have gone negative, would they have supported that? In other words, what if you had gone into severe debt,

would they help you with that, or just blamed it on you and left the burden in your hands? I didn't think you're the AH, I think they're greedy. Just...

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puzzlegrizz − NTA. Stop sending money and stop communicating with anyone who is telling you to give your “family” more than what you already have.

Walk away with a clear conscience that you have gone above and beyond for them. They will never appreciate you and unless you put a stop to it now, they...

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Significant_Limit_68 − NTA. Your brother lived home for free. You paid for a house. Your brother owes you money since he lived home for free.

Some_Refrigerator677 − Dump your family man they are leeches dont sent your brother anything. Tell him he can come work for u and earns his money.

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LogResident6185 − NTA you have a bunch of leeches and not a family back home. Don't give them anything.

Adorable_Rip_4069 − With a brother and family like this, who needs enemies… From what you described, NTA.

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kitkatsniksnak − NTA you don't owe him or your family anything. It is up to you what you do with the money you earned, and it looks like you've been...

They don't get to ask for more, they can do the same thing you did and hire someone to work the land and get higher yield while they go make...

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You are also very generous in allowing your brother to work your lands even though you could hire up. You keep doing what is best for you.

At the end of the day, you have to live with the choices you make - how would you feel about yourself and your family if you have them half...

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Koquet − NTA. Don't give them a dime. You paid him while you worked away, so you don't owe him anything.

Moose-Live − Sounds like a good time to part company with your greedy, entitled family. NTA.

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From the unwanted middle child to a self-made businessman, he built his future through risk and sacrifice. Now that success has reignited old family dynamics—this time with money at the center.

Should personal success automatically be split because of blood ties? Or does responsibility end where sacrifice begins?

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