AITA for not telling my mother that my brother can't use MY laptop?

A teenager’s personal laptop, a modest birthday gift, became the center of a heated family conflict when their younger brother demanded to use it for gaming. With a powerful new family PC already dominated by the brother, the mother sided with him during her brief need for the computer—forcing the teen to give up their device and physically slamming it shut in anger.

The situation escalated into damaged property and potential injury, leaving the teen labeled ungrateful for refusing to share. This incident exposes deeper issues of favoritism, respect for personal boundaries, and concerning parental reactions when faced with sibling demands.

‘AITA for not telling my mother that my brother can’t use MY laptop?’

A reliable old Lenovo laptop serves as one teen’s personal property amid family gaming tensions.

I have a pretty old but reliable Lenovo laptop that is worth 300$,maybe less.(I got the laptop as a birthday gift from a family friend) My father decided to build...

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which he spent 1250$ on,a computer that is used 99% by my brother,because he plays Fortnite and Roblox and he doesnt want to play those games on his phone.

The brother’s frustration boiled over when their mother needed the family PC, leading to demands on the teen’s laptop.

Today,my mother had some work to do on the PC and my brother was angry that he couldn't stream idk what game.(that he also had on his phone ).

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He of course started whining and mom told me to get off my laptop to let him do what he wanted to. I of course refused. He smashed my laptop's...

Past aggression from the mother resurfaced, resulting in the laptop being confiscated after refusal.

My mother also did that when I was playing and she almost broke my fingers since they got cought betwwen the screen and the keyboard. She called me an ungrateful...

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This story centers on a clear violation of personal property rights compounded by favoritism and physical aggression in parenting. The laptop, explicitly a gift to the teen, remains their sole possession—yet family dynamics treat it as communal when convenient for the favored younger sibling. What makes the story more complicated is the mother’s use of force to enforce sharing, risking injury and damaging the device.

Some might argue parents have authority to mandate sharing among children for harmony. However, the wider perspective highlights that respecting individual gifts teaches responsibility and boundaries, especially as teens approach adulthood. Physical actions like slamming a laptop on hands constitute abuse, not discipline, and excusing the brother’s destructive tantrum enables poor behavior.

Prioritizing one child’s entertainment over another’s property and safety creates resentment and unsafe environments. Open communication with the father, password protection, and professional support if abuse persists are crucial steps toward fairness and protection.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

Many users firmly backed the teen, emphasizing ownership rights and condemning the physical aggression.

camadon23 − NTA. How could anyone blame you for not wanting your computer damaged or disrespected? Stand your ground, OP.

[Reddit User] − If you needed to use the expensive family computer and your brother was on it, would he let you use it?

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IzzyIzzard − NTA, it sounds like your mother doesn’t want to parent your brother and deal with his anger issues and potential gaming addiction (based on his reaction to not...

LoganDeLuca2004 − NTA. Talk to your dad. Also how old are you and your brother?

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From_The_Heart1020 − NTA Did I read that right? She smashed your fingers between the screen and keyboard? Dear God, when you turn 18, get the hell away from her.

PhysicalPlate7 − NTA. Your mother doesn't want to deal with your whiny brother. You didn't comply with her ridiculous command so she took her frustration out on you. Maybe talk...

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Several commenters raised serious concerns about abuse, urging the teen to seek help and protect themselves.

Important-Hat − NTA. That laptop was given to *you* as a birthday present from someone outside of your household. It belongs to you, and you only. You shouldn't have to...

Especially not a bratty sibling. Considering what you said they do to your laptop, I definitely wouldn't want to let anyone use it. Have you told your father about all...

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If you haven't already, I'd put a password on it. You said you're 17? (I read all the current comments) That's an age old enough that you should be allowed...

I'm a mother to an 8 year old kid myself; the *only* restrictions we have on *her* things is some things aren't allowed outside of the house or other kids...

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or if she wants to give some toys away, we ask that she asks us first, because some of them are sentimental to us because we gave them to her...

mochaluvr1 − NTA. Your brothers behavior is worrisome, and you had the right to say no to the use of your property. Your mother is worse than the AH here....

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My mother also did that when I was playing and she almost broke my fingers since they got cought betwwen the screen and the keyboard.

Smashing your fingers in the laptop because you said "no" to giving your brother your property is not ok under any circumstances. THIS IS PHYSICALLY ABUSIVE BEHAVIOR.

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She called you an "ungrateful brat". THIS IS VERBAL ABUSE. It doesn't matter what reasons you are given to justify what your mother did. THERE IS NO EXCUSE.

I'm a mandatory reporter and if you were my student, I would immediately follow procedure and make a phone call.

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Tell your father everything, and if this is the norm in your household reach out to someone who can help you. Yes, you're almost 18; but you shouldn't have to...

EDIT: Just read through OP's post history. OP if you can, GET OUT OF THAT HOUSE ASAP. Create a plan, save money (that they don't know about), and GTFO and...

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A few added practical or light observations, including doubt about the laptop’s suitability for the games.

[Reddit User] − NTA 100% Good luck. Protect your stuff.

[Reddit User] − Nope. And for the record none of those games would’ve worked on ur laptop

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The community unanimously agreed the teen is not at fault for protecting their personal gift, with many highlighting the mother’s actions as abusive and the brother’s behavior as unchecked. Standing firm on boundaries is validated, especially when sharing risks damage or harm.

Have you dealt with family favoritism over shared or personal items growing up? How did you handle demands to give up your things to siblings? Drop your stories below!

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