All of my scunchies started going missing when I met my boyfriend?

It started as a harmless mystery that slowly became impossible to ignore. A woman realized that her scrunchies were disappearing one by one, right around the same time she began dating someone new. At first, it felt almost silly to be upset over hair accessories, but the pattern became too consistent to brush off.

As the relationship was still fresh, she hesitated to confront him directly. Still, curiosity and frustration eventually won. When she finally asked, she wasn’t prepared for where the conversation would lead. What followed was a confession that left her stunned, questioning trust, boundaries, and whether something this strange could be laughed off or taken seriously. Social media users had plenty to say, and their reactions ranged from horrified to darkly amused.

 

[UPDATE] All of my scunchies started going missing when I met my boyfriend?

Advertisement

Everything felt normal at first, until a strange pattern began quietly forming around her belongings…

Y’allllll. He just left and I have to write this now while it’s fresh in my mind.

So, as many of you came at me for not doing immediately, I had a talk with him tonight. I had planned on it, but when I discovered the last...

Advertisement

I didn’t want to approach it via text or while either of us were working, so I figured I’d just wait till this evening to approach him. A lot of...

Once she brought up the missing scrunchies, his reaction immediately felt off…

Most of you were wrong, but a few of you beautiful, twisted people got it right. Without further ado, allow me to provide my best recollection of the conversation:. Me:...

Advertisement

Him: Not really, don’t you have one on your night stand?. Me: yeah, but I used to have A LOT more and now they’re missing. It’s so weird.

As the pressure mounted, his demeanor shifted in a way she couldn’t ignore…

At this point his demeanor kind of changed. To be fair I was staring him down and he knew I knew. He just shrugged at me.

Advertisement

The demeanor switch gave me enough of a spidey sense that I just flat out asked them why he was taking them. He initially tried to say that he didn’t,...

After pushing harder, she finally got the confession she wasn’t prepared to hear…

Advertisement

I pressed him saying I never saw them on his wrist and I always kiss him good bye so I would notice. He looked like he was about to start...

I got frustrated and raised my voice and demanded to know, at which point he admitted he was masturbating with them.

Advertisement
He went on to explain how it started and why he kept taking more…

I just kinda stared at him and for a second I was glad that I made the post because the initial shock wasn’t as bad since it was brought to...

I had him explain and he said that one night early on he was at my place and we had made out but I told him I didn’t want to...

Advertisement

I only had scented lotions around and he was worried I’d notice that he smelt like them, so he chose the next best thing which I guess was my ultra...

Despite the apology, the trust damage felt significant…

After he defiled my poor scrunchie, he apparently panicked and rinsed it out and put it in his pocket. I guess this experience ignited something within him, because he started...

Advertisement

When I asked why he didn’t just keep up with the same one and wash it or buy his own pack, he said that it felt better because it was...

He told me he would never take another one and apologized profusely for being weird. He even offered to buy me new ones. While he wasn’t as manipulative or scary...

Advertisement

I asked for space and he left. So yeah, I don’t really know what I plan to do from here, but now we all know! Apparently scrunchies of your loved...

Discovering a partner’s secret behavior can be unsettling, especially when it involves personal belongings and a lack of consent. While the boyfriend framed his actions as attraction and attachment, the secrecy surrounding them created a serious trust issue. Even seemingly small actions can feel deeply invasive when they happen without permission.

From another angle, the boyfriend’s explanation points to sexual curiosity mixed with emotional closeness. Using something that belonged to his partner made him feel connected, but failing to ask or be honest crossed an important line. Attraction never justifies deception.

Relationship expert Dr. John Gottman from The Gottman Institute has stated, “Trust is built in very small moments.” Those moments include honesty, respect, and acknowledging boundaries early on. When those moments are missed, rebuilding trust can take far more effort than expected.

For anyone navigating an uncomfortable discovery, experts often recommend slowing down and reassessing comfort levels. Open conversations, clear boundaries, and time apart can help clarify whether the relationship can move forward. Feeling unsettled is a valid reaction, and prioritizing emotional safety is never an overreaction.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

Many users supported her decision to step back, saying the behavior crossed an uncomfortable line…

WermerCreations − Putting the “crunchy” into “scrunchy” lol.

Advertisement

Baldussimo − That’s…. yeah. That’s a lot. Sorry you had to deal with this.

Exulansis22 − I was afraid it was a s__ thing. Sorry that creepy thing happened to you. Good on your spidey senses

Advertisement

Extreme-Narwhal-3452 − So happy I caught the update early, but baby this is weird…. Really weird. I say it ain’t no coming back from this like I can’t explain why...

Others took a more critical stance, focusing on trust and dishonesty rather than the sexual aspect…

[Reddit User] − I think this relationship has run its course because he stole from you and then he lied to you.

Advertisement

Blood_sweat_and_beer − That’s, uh, super odd. And def not cute. He’s stealing your belongings so he can masturbate with them. He honestly believes that his hornyness and desire to masturbate...

A few reactions leaned into humor, using jokes to process the sheer awkwardness of the reveal…

bird-girl − Ewwwwwwwww. Ew ew ew ew ewwwwwwww.

Advertisement

yersinia_pisstest − Maybe he uses them as diy ballsack stretchers? STEP ONE: take scrunchie STEP TWO: have scrunchie s__ STEP THREE: add scrunchie to the ones he already has on...

4snail20 − Girl pls tell me you’re gonna break up w the scrunchie f__ker 😭

Advertisement

NextAffect8373 − I don't even know what to say about that. I mean it sounded before like he's taken at least 15 or 20 of them and I don't get...

What began as a small mystery ended with a confession that reshaped how one woman viewed her relationship. While her boyfriend’s actions weren’t violent or threatening, they still crossed personal and emotional boundaries. Trust, once shaken, is difficult to rebuild, especially so early on. Some see the situation as bizarre but harmless, while others view it as a clear dealbreaker. In the end, the decision rests with her comfort level and sense of safety. What would you do if you were in her place?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?
Loading poll…